What Got You Here Won't Get You There

This book has been by far the longest read book I've ever had. I think I started reading this about more than a year ago and for some reason kept ignoring it in spite of having it in my backpack every day. Among many other reasons Angry Birds was definitely one that kept me away from completing this book sooner. ;-) Finally made it a few weeks ago and eventually got time to write about it.

This is yet another book which reveals a few "aha" moments where you smack yourselves wondering why you didn't realize this earlier. The funny thing is, as I read the book I continue to make the same mistakes, but the realization happens more sooner than later. Should try harder I guess to avoid repeating the same in future. Let's see...

The premise of the book is simple - the very same traits that made you "successful" till now will pull you down to move ahead. Paradoxical is what I thought initially, but few pointers did bring out the "aha" or rather "oops".

Marshall talks about 20 basic flaws that leaders normally get into. By leaders we don't have to look at the executive level. Anybody who's had the responsibility for more than his / her own work is a leader in some sense - regardless of corporate designation.

1. Winning too much: The need to win at all costs and in all situations – when it matters, when it doesn't  and when it’s totally beside the point.
2. Adding too much value: The overwhelming desire to add our two cents to every discussion.
3. Passing judgement: The need to rate others and impose our standards on them.
4. Making destructive comments: The needless sarcasms and cutting remarks that we think make us sound sharp and witty.
5. Starting with “No,” “But,” or “However”: The overuse of these negative qualifiers which secretly say to everyone, “ I’m right. You’re wrong.”
6. Telling the world how smart we are: The need to show people we’re smarter than they think we are.
7. Speaking when angry: Using emotional volatility as a management tool.
8. Negativity, or “Let me explain why that won’t work”: The need to share our negative thoughts even when we weren't asked.
9. Withholding information: The refusal to share information in order to maintain an advantage over others.
10. Failing to give proper recognition: The inability to praise and reward.
11. Claiming credit that we don’t deserve: The most annoying way to overestimate our contribution to any success.
12. Making excuses: The need to reposition our annoying behaviour as a permanent fixture so people excuse us for it.
13. Clinging to the past: The need to deflect blame away from ourselves and onto events and people from our past; a subset of blaming everyone else.
14. Playing favourites: Failing to see that we are treating someone unfairly.
15. Refusing to express regret: The inability to take responsibility for our actions, admit we’re wrong, or recognize how our actions affect others.
16. Not listening: The most passive-aggressive form of disrespect for colleagues.
17. Failing to express gratitude: The most basic form of bad manners.
18. Punishing the messenger: The misguided need to attack the innocent who are usually only trying to help us.
19. Passing the buck: The need to blame everyone but ourselves.
20. An excessive need to be “me”: Exalting our faults as virtues simply because they’re who we are.

Thanks to this link I did not have to type all of the above. :-)

Of course not every concept hits you (hard) all the time. Highlighted below a few excerpts which made this book to be a "must read" for anybody (in my perception of course).

(Text in italics are picked from the book)

• Adding too much value - It is extremely difficult for successful people to listen to other people tell them something they already know without communicating somehow (a) "we already knew that" and (b) "we know a better way". You may have improved the content by 5% but you've reduced my commitment to executing it by 50% because you've taken away my ownership of the idea. Try to remember this next time you try to implement a change and you want to involve your team to be a part of the change.  
• Telling the world how smart we are - Being smart turns people on. Announcing how smart you are turns them off. All along I always believed in the principle of self-marketing. It looks like thin-ice after all. Gotta tread carefully.
• Let me explain why that wont work - "If you catch yourself frequently saying, "Let me tell you why that won't work", you know what needs fixing. Can't explain the pleasure of proving someone wrong. Especially if that is going to get yourselves in the limelight. What you lose by this is people approaching you for any positive critique of an idea.
• Making excuses - If we can stop excusing ourselves, we can get better at almost anything we choose. Such a profound statement. Very easy to fall into this pit and very convenient as well. Are you ready to take ownership and responsibility?
• An excessive need to be "me" - I behave this way, and I achieve results. Therefore, I must be achieving results because I behave this way. In other words its simple egotism. However this is one of the key concepts of this book. Just because you were successful because of a particular behaviour it is no free pass to repeat the same and expect a bigger success. Adaptation is key.
• People will do something  - including changing their behaviour - only if it can be demonstrated that doing so is in their own best interests as defined by their own values. People only change their ways when what they truly value is threatened. I've always wondered why people don't agree with me when the expected outcome is going to be valuable to them. The key here is "as defined by their own values". Have you attempted to understand what their values are?
• In the "can-do"  environment in an organization there is no system for honouring the avoidance of a bad decision or the cessation of a bad behaviour. Especially at this time of the year when the annual review happens, can we measure avoidance of stupidity as a key objective?
• When sharing information or emotion, we have to ask "is this appropriate and how much should I convey?". Sometimes we do this delibrately to get someone else into trouble. As in poker, the greatest trick is to know "when to fold" not go "All In" every time.
• It is a whole lot easier to see our problems in others than it is to see them in ourselves.Gives a whole new meaning to "a thief can catch a thief". It's so easy to be objective with others than ourselves.
• An apology gives you a sense of closure. Closure lets you move forward. The idea is to move on into the future and not let the past hold you back (emotional luggage).
• Feedforward - "Helping people be right is more productive than proving them wrong". This is a bit different to "feedback" that we are all used to. I think our performance review systems should be changed 180 deg. 
• Measurement - Everything is measurable if we're clever enough to see that it needs measuring - and can devise a way to track it. Gotta remember to use this whenever we need to talk about "metrics". Most often we prefer to stay in the dark being ignorant to the need to measure something.

So there you go... hope you had a moment or  2 of aha or oops. This book was gifted to me by some of my team members. Probably they wished I read and act on some of the lessons mentioned. Tough luck guys....it took a while for me to Get Here. Wishing you all the best to Get There!!

Happy Reading

C

Yet another year goes by....

The last year's post ended (or began this year's post??) with "2012 seems quite interesting in many many ways. Let's see how it goes..." Not sure I remember what I had in mind then, but it truly has been quite interesting. There were quite a few "firsts" that I experienced this year, some of I wrote about, some I could not - but all good (well... mostly good). :-)

I see that as the years go by am becoming more and more irregular in writing a post here. As always - easy to blame on so many things but serves no purpose. A quiet Friday evening at home with the little one sleeping and the girls out to the park. May not get another chance like this before this year ends. :-) 

For one, the social life has been the busiest this year in Sydney - thanks to a bunch of great friends. In fact the last 2 months has been quite hectic with some event or the other happening every weekend. It even reached a point where a trip to the city for shopping turned into a 100 km ride up to Central Coast all of a sudden. Nandhitha's classes did add up a bit to our "busy"ness. We truly look forward to those school breaks when most classes take a break as well. 

I guess I've been most active on FaceBook this year compared to the last few years I've been online. So many interesting people to be attributed for that. I now force myself many times not to comment get into a conversation. Some people still manage to tickle my fingers ;-) Definitely something to be controlled for future. 

Professionally it has been a mixed bag year with ups and downs. Getting into business development gave (and continues to give) me a whole new perspective on a wide range of things. It's been a learning almost every day. Professional network exploded - thanks to LinkedIn and the complimentary forums and meetups. Hopefully they all add up to something materialistic. Trips to India, Shanghai, Muscat and recently Manila did add up to the "interesting"ness quotient for this year.

Coincidentally this week marks the completion of 150 weeks of Sydney Stories!! Oh what a ride.... :-)

Hopefully I do better next year with catching up with you all via the blog or otherwise more frequently.

Thanks again for a wonderful year!!

Wishing you all a Very Happy 2013!! Wishing you the best of health, wealth and spirits!!

Regards

C

p.s.: Glad that I could make this post in one sitting. ;-)

Muscat Mutterings

Muscat had a long weekend last week - Thursday to Saturday (instead of Friday - Saturday). However did manage to have a couple of hours of discussion with a company run by fellow mana vaadus (from Andhra). It was an interesting company where they had everybody "imported" from Andhra -  from car driver, chef to of course the big boss as well. They waited on us so well the last few days we were there. It felt soooo much like home.

Thursday night was a sea food night at the Crowne. Lobsters,  king prawns, fishes grilled to perfection and to your taste. I found a tamilian guy behind a grill. Asked him "nalla urappa pottu kodunga nna" (spice it up pls!!). He was mighty thrilled. He brought a huge bowl of chilli, marinated my selections and grilled them just the way it should be. :-) 

My job got over sooner than expected, but it was too expensive to return a day earlier so stayed on as per my original plan. Friday was quite uneventful. Saturday was quite hectic with an early morning beach combing for sea shells. Came out with a pretty good collection after about 15-20 minutes. Later in the morning ventured out to see the famous Muthra Souk. I guess one of the most touristy spots in Muscat city. It was an interesting scene. There was one main pathway in the "mall" where only gift and souvenir shops existed and the clientele was predominantly tourists from all over the globe. Every few 100 meters there were side gullies where all the local shops where the locals shopped. Anything from dresses to groceries to jewellery. It was an all in one mall.

After shopping I was roaming around taking a few photos which should've attracted a taxi driver. Asked him to take me to an Omani restaurant. Sensing my touristy curiosity he offered to take me on a "scenic route" which only the tourists took for 1 Riyal extra. Eventually landed in the restaurant after a quick tour around the place and government offices. The so called Omani restaurant was run by a fellow Mallu sahib who as been there for 40+ years. 80% of the dishes were what I could get in any multicuisine restaurant in Bangalore. Managed to identify one Omani dish - Chicken Maqboos. It was a good cross between a chicken briyani and fried rice. Took a "parcel" of chicken fry to my colleagues back in the hotel.

Muscat has a huge infiltration of Indians and Filipinos performing a variety of jobs.Filipinos (their "Sir" is such a give away) were mostly in the food and beverage or retail outlets. Indians of course did anything and everything. Their currency is interesting. The primary unit of measure being Riyal (OMR), it is divided into 1000 baisa. There are currency notes upto 100 baisas below which it goes to coins. 1 riyal was close to 3 Aussie $s. However the cost of living seemed quite cheap compared to Oz even after a $ conversion.                    

The return journey was quite eventful as well. Managed to get upgraded to business class using frequent flyer miles from Dubai to Sydney - a 14 hour journey. What can I say....everything was special on that side of the aircraft. Including the toilet which was decorated with a live orchid. Having a built in massage seat does relax a few muscles. ;-) The best part was the incline and leg support. Had to fiddle with the controls initially until I got used to what I can do. I could only remember my first "remembered" flight from Chennai to Singapore (89??)  Now I wonder....if business was so...what will first class be??? Maybe one day.... :-)

So long.... bye for now.

Photos available here.

C

Marhaba (Hello) from Muscat

Hello,

Wishing you all a Very Happy Diwali!! (Belated of course....)

Note: This post has a few links embedded and better to be read on the web than email.

The past few weeks have been quite interesting and eventful, so thought of writing a few lines before it becomes a blur in memory.

It all started with one of my Bangladeshi colleagues coming up to me asking for translation of an Hindi song from Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna. Everybody assumes every Indian should (or must??) know Hindi. Somehow managed with giving him direct translations of few words that I could Google. Guess he was contented with that since he didn't come back. Of course it could be that he figured out my Hindi competency and took pity on me. :-)

The week ended with a very interesting function in Melbourne which was co-sponsored by one of my clients. It was something to do with Melbourne Cup - the race that stops the nation. I actually got to touch and lift the cup and even have some photos taken with it.

Now am in Muscat for a week on an assignment. The journey started with some excitement in the flight. Apparently one of the engines (out of the 4) of the A380 burst. We did not feel much inside maybe for a small jerk which one could expect for a mild turbulence. After 2 hours of flying the flight was grounded back to Sydney. The situation inside the aircraft was very well controlled without creating any panic. In fact I finished watching a movie (Vazhakku En 18/9) without knowing the actual impact of what happened. Apparently that has made some news as well. Landed back in Sydney at around 1.30 AM. Was accomodated in a nearby IBIS hotel. That night was dreadful trying to rebook myself on the next available flight to Muscat. Had to call the help desk every 15-20 minutes to check on status. Finally got myself booked on the 6 AM flight at 4.30 AM. Rushed back to the airport and made it to the gate 10 minutes before boarding. Must appreciate the customer support at Emirates for getting me a seat at such short notice.

Reached Muscat with a short stop over in Dubai. Muscat is surrounded by mountains on one side and the coast on the other. All buildings are either white or a shade of brown in colour. The temperature seems very much like Chennai with a tad lower on humidity. Had been to a "hypermarket" very similar to Total mall in Bangalore. Could see a lot of us around speaking tamil and malayalam. The cost of products seems quite economical compared to Australia. I could see a lot of Indian products in the market from VIP suit cases to Van Heusen shirts manufactured in Bangalore. The key mode of public transport seems to be taxis. The rate had to be negotiated before you get in as no cab has any meter. Fortunately the charges seemed to be quite reasonable for the distance covered.  

I was invited to a "manager's reception" at the Crowne Plaza the day before (where I am eventually staying now) by my fellow colleagues. Later in the evening went to a Turkish sea food restaurant. It was a wonderful feast with lobsters, king prawns and a huge fish which almost looked and tasted like chicken. Muscat (and probably the other middle eastern countries) have an interesting way of beginning the new year. It is not a fixed date every year. It was decided about 2 days ago that this would be a long weekend - from Thursday - Saturday (normally it is only Friday & Saturday).

Had an opportunity to watch an international football (soccer) match between Oman and Japan. It was the FIFA qualifying match for the 2013 world cup. It was quite a close match till the end with each team having a goal on their side. The energy was awesome as soon as Oman scored their first goal. It continued until the last few minutes when Japan had their 2nd goal and the crowd started to leave the stadium.

So long folks. More to follow after my remaining stay in Muscat.

C

A Sporty Week...

Not sure if it is the onset of the Olympics in London, but it was sports and sports everywhere.

It began with Nandhitha's "Olympathon" at school - what we were used to call as "Annual Sports Day". The Darcy Road Public had their Annual Olympathon last week. It began with a march past of the kids broken into different teams each carrying a country flag. As a truly multinational community they represented a flag from each country from where a student came from. The "Olympic torch" was relayed by the respective house captains (6th graders). It was a nice "torch" made with flaring coloured paper. As soon as they came and "lit" the pyre, someone quickly placed glowing fire (paper) on the pyre. 

What happened afterwards was a bit chaotic. They had like a carnival of games that each team had to participate. It took us about 20 minutes to figure out where Nandhitha belonged. The parents cheered their wards for a while and later on ended up just chatting up with friends. Could've been a bit more organized...but I guess there's only so much one can do with primary schoolers? (Maybe I am wrong!!)

The Olympathon did take me into a nostalgic trip. Have some vague memories of sports days at Fatima (or should I say St. Josephs!!) participating in some sack race and cart wheel races. Of course as years progressed, the interest/intent for attending sports days at St Josephs changed. ;-) Sports days at Holy Cross was always an event to look forward to. I've always wanted to avoid being part of the march past drill. Oh well... :-)

Later over the weekend Uma and I partipated in the Badminton Mixed Doubles event. I did extreme practicing - TWICE for this event!! While the event was conducted very professionally with live score updates on Facebook (follow them at Sydney Supersonics SSCI), I participated in the "true" spirit of sportsmanship - to socialize and have fun!! So, while we lost 9-21 in the first round, we did have good fun. The kids had a great time at the play area next to the hall.

Have a great week!!

C

"Feather"dale Visit

Hello,

2 weeks ago I got a call from a friend from Phoenix whom I had not spoken since 2007. It was a pleasant surprise and came to know that she was visiting Sydney for a week to tour around. She arrived over the weekend and had shown interest to visit a zoo which was quite close to our house. It is a 10 minute drive from here and we had not taken a chance to see in the last 2.5 years!! Guess it took a visitor from the Wild Wild West for us to look at some next door wilderness!! So we went to the Featherdale Wildlife Park which was tucked inside a quiet suburb nearby-http://www.featherdale.com.au/ .

It was a small zoo which could be covered in a few hours. A very nice idea for a picnic (they allow food to be brought in from outside) on a good weather day. The weather was bearable though it turned out to be a bit nippy towards the later part of the afternoon.

Their primary attraction is the Koala bear. There were "heaps" of them mostly resting in their own cozy spots. It was interesting to see one Koala jump right into a zoo keeper's arms and she was carrying it around like a baby on the hip. There were few other native favourites such as Wombats, Wallabies, Dingos, Tasmanian Red Devil and of course the Roo (Kangaroo). We couldn't see a full grown roo though.

The surprising fact for me was the bird collection they had. Quite a variety for a zoo of that size. Some of the birds were quite "vocal" in showcasing their skills. Should've taken some video to record the melodies. Maybe next time. They had a collection of local and tropical birds. Very colourful indeed. It was a pity for the camera that the birds were in their fenced areas. Still managed to click a few virtually bypassing the fences. It was interesting to see the Peahen and the Peacock. Probably my first time seeing a Peahen? If the male (peacock) is supposed to be the prettier version....why do we correlate that with females in Tamil? It is quite ironical to call a girl "Mayil" - which basically means "not so pretty bird".

One another interesting feature was their "passport ticket". The entry pass had a small map and page with their local species. Next to each exhibit was a stamp pad and seal of that animal. Nandhitha found it "cool" to be stamping each animal. At the end we realized we missed out the Emu and went all the way to the other end of the park to get the stamp. Only to realize that one can stamp everything at one go just near the exit!!! 

Signing off for now...

Have a great week!!

C

Shanghai Connection

Hi,

This last week has been one of the most hectic days with a trip to Shanghai, Melbourne, Nandhitha's singing concert and a dinner party thrown in within a span of 7 days. It felt nice to get back to a routine Monday. :-)

Shanghai - what can I say, truly an experience. I had been there for 2 days for attending a conference where my organization had a booth. It was a first of a kind on several counts from going to China to hosting a booth in a conference. I survived. :-)

The fun began right from Sydney airport where I was the only non-mongolian or non-caucasian looking guy in the aircraft. Usually there is at least one of our brothers or sisters on their way back home. Probably not many prefer a stop over in Shanghai. ;-) Thanks to China Eastern airline's website I did not have any option to select a meal so braced myself for a culinary adventure in the flight. The moment the food came out the plan smelt exactly like a Chinese restaurant.

Have to write a few words about our Chino bhais. They have a tendency to travel in groups (which was a fact that was actually confirmed by an expert in the conference.) Almost everybody in the flight seemed to know each other. The moment the seat belt lights were turned off they got up and started chatting with their mates. I guess they don't trust their own country's airline for food...many had brought dried noodle packs to snack in between. I must admit that I did not have any major problem with the food (had a good fix for my chinese craving for the next couple of days). I guess one doesn't really give a damn for any announcement or sign board. Even if the toilet sign says occupied they try their luck by knocking at the door and even a light bang to see if someone is really inside. It was also funny to see people getting up from the seats the moment the wheels touched the ground on landing. The flight attendants had to rush behind them to sit down.

It was a 10 hour direct flight from Sydney to Shanghai. China Eastern was like 20 years behind on in flight entertainment (IFE as our industry folks call it). There was no personal entertainment screens (leave alone On Demand entertainment). Managed to watch Chinese, Japanese and Korean movies. Of course there was no use of the headset since all I needed was the sub title. One interesting movie (Korean) was "Architecture 101". It is about some high school / university romance and the concepts / drama seemed quite similar to an Indian movie. I guess sentiments are universal. :)

My culinary adventures were quite interesting not because of the cuisine but more due to the language. What can I say...I was not as prepared as some of my colleagues. They prepared printed cue cards of some of the common words they will be using to communicate. My colleague took me to a hawker where he was selling different types of barbeque sticks. There were different kinds of meats and veggies. I tried something that "looked" like chicken meat and also tasted like one. However not sure of what it was actually. :-)

It was a 2 day conference and I had to rush back immediately after the conference. Did not have much time for sight seeing except for a visit to the Bund. Which had the Shanghai sky line with the Pearl tower etc. The weather in Shanghai was just like in Chennai (or Mumbai as some would want to compare). The chinese males had an interesting way to escape the humidity. They all roll up their shirts up to their chest to get some "air". ;-) Anyways... thus ended my Shanghai connection. Not sure if I would want to go back again on my own except for a guided tour or something. One definitely needs a translator around (in whichever form).

Weekend was quite hectic with Nandhitha's first on stage performance for carnatic singing. It was a grand event - Raaga Sangamam 2012. Lots of efforts put in by the teacher, kids and of course the parents. :) It was worth the effort though...

So long folks....

Have A Great Week!!

C